Thursday, October 23, 2008

Levi Van Veluw

i heart levi van veluw. genius. talk about DIY.

i daydream that this guy would fly here from Amsterdam and do my Narra character design for free...

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

letters to myself

thank you swissmiss

Look on the bright side...

...the skies shall spell it out for you if only you take the time to look up beyond the dreary buildings...

Eyes on the Road

and can you guess the film from just one letter?

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

can i just rant?

it's been almost a month since i posted here... things have been an unending whirlwind of racing to cross out as many "things to do" in my unending lists. and i'm so tired. i think i'm more hardwired for lying down and reading a good book. i've spread myself too thin, i feel 2D.

i don't need just a coordinator, i need a production manager, who can make sound decisions, who has the initiative to get things done in a timely manner, who will not just wait for me to give orders.

i don't need an art director, i need a production designer. one wh0 can think out of the box, who can DESIGN, who can draw for chrissakes who will not say, "oo basta alam ko na yan"... i can't work with "basta".

it's ok to have fun, but it's hard to work with people who think "indie" filmmaking is one big party. is "wazak", is "rakenroll". it's hard work and i feel like one big kill joy. and that is the most detrimental thing that could happen to an un(der)-paid team. leading the team, one has to be charismatic, and fun to hang around with, and all good-vibes. but it's hard to put up appearances.

this film is really gonna push the people who decide to work for it, out of their comfort zones. do things they haven't done before. to figure things out for the first time and more often than not, do things they don't like doing. this is what LK requires. and it's frustrating that i can't pay the team for it. not that money will make people brilliant overnight. but money can get people to try. and this is what's so frustrating, that some people aren't even trying.

but not all of them are like that, I'm greatful for people who actually find ways around my vision. who are not afraid to think and share their ideas and their time. who actually come on time even if i'm late. thank you guys. i hope you don't lose faith.

maybe if LK was the only thing i'm doing... but i'm looking for a job, taking in small freelance jobs, wrapping up school requirements, rushing to help get a soap-opera concept in flight (with a january taping scheduled and a february airing date), doing child-care related chores, dealing with parents who want to throw me and my son out of the house because i'm "selfish" and "inconsiderate" and "a failure", "a leech". i mean, what do i say to that?

whew... now i've gotten that out, am taking a blog break and get back to work.